


shooting stars

by killuvax



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Gonkillu - Freeform, M/M, No Beta, Short Story, Touch-starved Killua, anyway I LOVE YOU WINDY💙💙💙💙💙💙, but idk pls tell how i did bc i don't think it turned out okay, i usually write dark themes so this was kinda hard for me, lowercase intended, mild angst but not really, short story means short chapters, there's also a puppy bc i NEED it, whale island, zoldycks mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:06:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 13,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29046603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killuvax/pseuds/killuvax
Summary: "i love you."in which killua zoldyck is lost at sea and never found again.
Relationships: Gon Freecs & Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck
Comments: 4
Kudos: 34





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WindyQ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindyQ/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> when will i see you again (intro loop) - slowed.

"the danger of adventure is worth a thousand days of ease and comfort."

── paulo coelho.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this story is just an excuse to use my wife's fav concepts of gonkillu honestly 
> 
> I LOVE YOU WINDYYY💚💙


	2. lukewarm

he gasps sharply whenever he finally wakes, eyes blown wide and dilated. he looks around frantically, seeing only blue until he finds the sun. it's blinding, and the absolute last thing his fragile eyes need to look directly into at the moment.

a half yelp half sob leaves the trembling boy as his blood stained hands fly up to shield his face. he curls in on himself, rolling onto his left side in an attempt to hide from the light. he doesn't have the strength to crawl right now─ let alone walk.

he wants to though, desperately so─ wants to run from wherever he is and find somewhere dark to hide, someplace cooler than the sunlight beaming directly onto his bare skin. it burns and he just wants to cry, scream out but there's nothing when he opens his mouth to try.

suddenly there's several loud screeches above him and he does scream this time, high pitched and absolutely terrified. he buries his face into his legs, his hands now above his head as he trembles.

his heart won't slow down, won't stop hammering against his rib cage at an alarming rate. he really, really wants to cry but he's much too tense─ his body won't allow him.

the distant sound of waves crashing directly behind him gives him an idea of where he is now, the water splashing against his back. it goes back and forth for what feels like hours until it finally calms, staying in the ocean.

he lays there for several minutes after, attempting to catch his breath before he rolls onto his back, looking up to see seagulls fluttering about above him.

the screeching, he supposes.

he inhales a shaky, shuddering breath as he closes his eyes again. it's nice now─ the warmth. now it feels like it's soaking into his tired body, lulling him to sleep once more.

he's very, very tired.

"hey, are you okay?!"

the voice sounded so close and out of breath, worried. he can hear the sound of something hitting the sand quite frantically beside his head, a sudden shadow over him. slowly, his eyes open to see a boy looming over him, big, brown eyes looking directly into his.

whoever he is, is in fact, worried. killua finds it amusing─ all that emotion for a stranger.

sickening.

a breathy laugh quietly escapes his lips, only to cause him to go into a coughing fit. it seems his lungs still have water in them─ it doesn't surprise him, though.

"a-ah, damn, i knew when i saw you on the hill that you looked like you were in pretty bad shape─ i just didn't realize it was this bad!"

the new boy moves back a bit suddenly, wrapping a tan arm under his knees and the other around his shoulder blades. the boy plants his bare feet into the sand as he stands, making sure he doesn't lose his balance.

killua doesn't have the strength to fight him off, as much as he desperately wants to.

•

when he wakes again, it's to the smell of something he hasn't smelled in a long, long time─ food.

he's in a bed, killua realizes when he turns over to look out a window. it's dark. the moon is out but the stars aren't in the sky just yet─ it still must be pretty early. he hums as he sits up, slowly, carefully once he sees that his right wrist is now wrapped up neatly. curious, killua lifts the thick blanket off him, rolling up pants that don't belong to him to find that his ankles are also banaged.

someone's treated his wounds and given him a fresh set of clothes─ baggy dark, grey sweats and a black t-shirt. the dry blood on his hands is also gone, now.

killua stands, tensing when he feels his muscles tighten in some places, stiffing in others. he's sore, he concludes, as he tip toes down wooden stairs. they lead him to what looks like a living room, a fire going in the fireplace in front of the couch. it cracks and pops as he walks past it, pushing open a door where the smell of food is coming from so strongly.

"no, aunt mito, i don't know his name─ he wasn't even coherent enough to ask when i found him, you know."

it's that boy again, sitting at a cozy and very homey looking kitchen table, slouched over. he sounds like he's tired of repeating himself, killua thinks.

the woman standing over a stove─ aunt mito, as the boy had called her ─sighed with a fond shake of her head, removing a large pot from the stove top to sit at the middle of the table. she only notices that killua's there when she turns to hang her apron up on a rack by the door.

she pauses for a moment, smiling before she continues.

"oh, you're finally awake! i was about to have gon go and fetch doctor letan in town after dinner─"

the boy, gon, finally turns to the door. when his eyes land on killua, he jumps up, rushing over to him faster than killua can keep up. he's taller than him, he realizes now that they're face to face─ a bit broader and wide, too.

or maybe he's not─ maybe he's just a normal size and height for his age. killua can't tell, what with his stunted growth. he had stopped growing years ago, and can't really remember the last time he had actually eaten a meal.

gon's hair is dark, unlike his own. it's such a rich black color, though, and killua can't help but think it's pretty. and gon's eyes─ he finds those much prettier for some reason, the color such a unique honey brown. dark yet light at the same time─ it's alluring.

"oh gosh─ i hope you sleep well! i really, really tried to pick out my most comfy clothes but that's all i could find! and their baggy on you...sorry about that, i─"

for the first time in months, killua spoke. his voice was soft, barely even a whisper but, still, gon could tell what he was saying by the way his lips moved. he wasn't smiling per say─ if anything, gon believes that he just thinks gon's rambling is amusing.

gon blushes out of pure embarrassment.

"...it's fine, thanks."

gon clears his throat, realizing how close they are suddenly. he backs away to give him some space, scratching at the back of his neck sheepishly as he points to the kitchen table behind them.

"u-um, my aunt mito made rabbit stew for supper, if you're hungry."

supper...? just where the hell is he?

there's a gasp from the table. "no, gon─ he is going to eat, just look at the poor thing! he was all skin and bones when i cleaned him up! he needs nutrients─ he's malnourished!"

wordlessly, killua walks past gon, too hungry to fight─ too tired. he sits across from mito as she immediately grabs a bowl, using the serving spoon to pour him an unnecessarily big helping.

she hands it to him with a warm smile. "there, sweetheart. eat as much as you like─ there's plenty if you want seconds, dear." after she watches killua take a hesitant first two bites, she turns toward the door.

"gon, don't just stand there, sit down and eat!"

"o-oh, yes ma'am! sorry!"

mito huffs, turning her attention back to killua. she sees that he hasn't eaten much, and he's eating quite slowly at that. her only guess is that it's because he's not used to eating much at one time, so he'll get full quicker. that or he just doesn't want to eat─ which she highly doubts, otherwise he would have declined the offer altogether.

"what's your name, darling?"

"...killua."

she hums, a smile spreading across her soft features "that's a pretty name. what's your last name?"

he tenses for a moment, gon notices, before he resumes chewing.

"it's just killua."

"...well, then, how old are you, killua?"

"hm...seventeen now, i think."

gon seems to lighten up at that "i just turned eighteen three days ago!"

when killua doesn't say anything, mito clears her throat. she looks over to gon's now empty bowl then back to killua─ the poor thing is trying his best to eat all of it and at this point, mito's worried he's going to make himself sick trying.

it's almost like he's trying to fill himself up because he doesn't know when he'll be able to eat again.

"...gon, go bathe while i start the apple pie? you've got a few errands to run tomorrow─ the water must have warmed up by now from earlier."

he looks hestaint─ like he wants to stay here and try to get killua to talk to him because he knows he will if he just keeps trying but, he doesn't want to upset aunt mito.

he stands with light sigh, grumbling a 'yes ma'am.' on his way out the door.

he's almost like a puppy, killua thinks.

•

"killua?"

"hm?"

as it turns out, a full stomach and clean clothes after a bath makes one very, very sleepy. killua can hardly keep his eyes open as he watches aunt mito wash the dishes from the kitchen table.

"gon said he found you on the beach...?"

oh. 

"yeah..."

she pauses for a moment.

"do you mind if i asked what happened?"

what happened, huh? killua sits up, stretching lightly as he yawns, showing off little kaines. mito thinks he looks like a kitten. a tiny, fluffy, white little kitten.

he smiles at her for the first time that day, looking directly into her eyes.

"...thank you for taking care of me. i appreciate it─ really, thank you."

and then he heads upstairs without another word.

mito doesn't want to use the word strange to describe him because─ really, that's not the case at all. he's more...mysterious. she hums to herself, setting another plate in the rack to dry before setting the sponge down and turning the tap off.

yes, mysterious, indeed.

•

"i said it's fine─ stop making a big deal about it already and just─"

gon sighs dramatically, throwing his arms above his head as he allows himself to fall onto the pallet beside his bed. killua hasn't known gon freecss for very long, but he's already getting on his nerves.

"idiot, what are you doing? i said it was fine─ i'm the one who's intruding, that doesn't mean you have to be the one to sleep on the floor."

gon shoots up to pout childishly at him in the dark.

"that's not how that works at all!"

killua frowns, turning his head away from him. "well, i'm still not changing my mind."

"fine."

"ha! i knew you would─ wait, what?"

gon smiles as he stands up, gesturing to the pallet with closed eyes.

"fine; you can sleep on the pallet."

he knows gon can't see the look he's giving him because of the dark but, for some reason, he cowers back anyway.

hesitantly, killua crawls into the pallet, curling into the blankets until he's comfortable. he doesn't dare look back to see what gon's doing, focusing on trying to sleep─ he can't remember the last time he slept like this, even if it's not an actual bed. it's still nice.

pale, thin fingers dig themselves into the soft blankets beneath him and he exhales deeply─ comfortable.

he was almost asleep when suddenly, the cover over him was lifted and gon crawled up beside him. killua nearly screamed in horror, turning ten shades of red.

"W-WHA─"

"shhh! don't wake aunt mito─ she gets really, really mad when you do!"

through gritted teeth, all killua could hiss was "fine─ what the hell are you doing?!"

"i said i would let you sleep on the pallet because you were throwing such a fit about it, but...aunt mito would be disappointed in me if i slept on the bed while i let you sleep on the floor─ she wouldn't care that you wanted to, trust me."

killua gripped the fabric of the sweats he was still wearing, lowering his head so that his overgrown bangs hid his face so gon couldn't see him blushing like a mad man.

"...honestly, you're such an idiot! you think so small that it's almost─"

"there's more, though!"

he's whining, again.

killua lifts his head just enough to look at gon. he was frowning, deeply, down at him.

"i wasn't going to let you sleep on the floor anyway─ not by yourself, at least. you're hurt and you could get cold on the floor and wind up sick and worsing─"

he's also ignoring him.

killua knows that he can't get sick─ not from a cold, anyway. and he highly doubts this moron realizes that the wounds he was looking at were actually stab wounds. who knows what he thinks they are.

"you're stupid."

gon pauses, taken a bit off guard by that because killua no longer sounded mad─ almost playful, he thinks. he tries to laugh.

"h-huh?"

"alright, you can stay─ but only because i'm tired and i don't want to listen to you continue to ramble on and on and on all night."

gon feels an undescribable heat rush throughout his body when he sees killua smile up at him through the little moonlight coming through his open window.

killua rolls over.

"g-goodnight, killua,"

he swears he heard killua purr.

"goodnight."

gon freecss, huh?


	3. prologue

he doesn't understand it, really. he was only supposed to stay the night and go the next morning.

"hey, killua, what about this one?"

but for some reason, he couldn't be bothered by it. he's thought over it for half the morning, mulling over any and all reason's why whale island would be worse then where he had originally planned on going. killua can only think of one thing, honestly─ whale island doesn't have his favorite thing in the entire world.

chocorobos.

however much of an inconvenience as that is, the good still outweighs the bad, though. living on an island in the middle of absolutely nowhere does seem much more low profile then attempting to start over in york new city─ especially with his name. word would travel too fast, even in a large place like that.

but. he's still thinking about it─ as of right now, though, he's leaning more towards whale island then york new city, for more logical reasons.

and there's also the fact the he doesn't have enough money to pay another bum to take him there. he lost all his belongings when he washed up here. no money whatsoever. he hums thoughtfully to himself, picking up a plain yellow t-shirt, stormy blue gray eyes scanning over the piece of clothing in distaste.

maybe he could get a job somewhere around here and save up again.

with a huff, he throws the shirt back onto the wooden rack before turning sharply back to where gon freecss is rummaging through more clothes that are on dispaly. he's already got three pairs of pants so far, all folded over his arm neatly. killua scoffs, walking up to him and glaring at what gon's eyeing so intensely.

gon seems oddly focused on a certain pair but, for the life of him killua can't tell which one.

"what the hell are you looking at? what─ wait, don't tell me you're gonna try and buy me something green! ugh, i thought i already told you─"

gon shakes his head, his free hand moving from his chin to move a black pair of slacks out of the way. he smiles when he sees apparently what he's been looking for, holding it up to show killua like a child that's showing their parents the picutre they drew of their family.

killua can feel his blood pressure rising.

"you think you're really funny, don't you? come on, laugh. i know you want to."

gon frowns, smile falling as he turns the pink sweater around to face him as if trying to figure out what was wrong with it. what─ was it too big? too small? or maybe─

"ugh, i knew this was a horrible idea from the start! you clearly know nothing about fashion, anyone can see that by the way you dress! i mean, really? ALL green?! who does that─"

"but that was yesterday─"

which was true. today, killua had sure he was at least color-coordinated before going into town with him because there was just simply no other way he was going. he'd rather cut his own tongue off then be seen with gon.

"that's not the point! i gave you a chance─ like you begged me to ─and now you've ruined it. it was already bad enough when you tried to get me a skirt─"

"i didn't know it was a skirt, i swear!"

"go wait outside!"

"wha─ but killuaa─"

"now, gon!"

"you would look really pretty in that sweater, though! please let me─"

"OUT!"

•

"oh! over here, killua! you'll like the milkshakes they have!"

gon doesn't let him say no, already dragging him into the ice cream parlour before he can even blink. the place isn't anything like all the other ice cream places killua's ever been to─ there's no booths, just bar chairs at the counter. but it isn't just plain, either─ lots of colorful banners and posters advertising the menu are all over the place.

he'd still rather go to the one back home, though. at least they have chocorobo special combo flavors.

"what do you want, killua?"

he taps his fingers on the counter bordly, scanning over the menu he'd been handed by the old man waiting patiently for their orders. he's smiling at them. killua thinks he's weird.

"...okay, i want three fudge scoops with chocolate chip's and sprinkles ontop...oh! and caramel syrup, too."

the old man's smile twitchs for a moment, almost disapearing before he suddenly laughs, scribbling away on a little notepad. once he's done, he turns to gon.

"and the usual for you, gon?"

he still seems to be in shock, nodding slowly while looking at his shoes. once the man walks away, gon looks at him with a heavy, heavy frown.

"killua...you shouldn't eat so much chocolate at one time─ aunt mito says your stomach will hurt after─"

"gon, i was going light, you know? trust me, that was nothing compared to what i usually get."

"...what do you usaully get?"

his blood pressure is rising again.

"gon."

"hm?"

"what's the one thing i've wanted since i've got here that─ for some stupid reason ─doesn't get shipped to this island?"

"huh...? the, the chocolate robot thingy, right?"

"IT'S CALLED CHOCOROBO, MORON!"

"sorry, sorry, i didn't mean to─"

killua whines, loudly, slumping onto the counter as he pouts, arms above his head while he presses his face into the cool, polished wood. he feels like crying.

"can we please stop talking about it? it's bad enough that i'll probably never even see the logo again!"

gon's brows furrow, eyes narrowing. he's starting to get a little annoyed, honestly. killua's been acting very...spoiled today. yeah. that's one way to put it.

"but you were the one who brought it up..."

he seems to come out of whatever world he was moping in, head snapping up faster then gon's eyes can keep up. he almost looks like a cat, gon thinks, what with the way his lips pull back to show off little kanies and how deeply his eyes narrow at him.

"you─"

suddenly, there's two cones being shoved in their faces and the sound of the old man's laughter bounces through out the small shop again.

"there ya go, a mint supreme with fudge syrup and...and a double chocolate delight! enjoy!"

gon seems to lighten right up, eagerly taking the ice cream cone into his hands as he hops off of the bar stool, killua following with an exaggerated huff. gon goes to grab his wallet out of his back pocket but the man's booming laugh rises, waving a big hand around.

"it's on the house, gon! it's not often you bring a friend, you know, so don't worry about it kid."

the moment gon shakes his head no, killua picks up the three bags full of clothes beside his seat before heading out the door, leaving gon to try and convince the man to─ for some reason killua will never understand ─accept the money anyway.

killua scoffs, kicking a rock as heads back to mito's house.

"honestly, what's up with that kid anyway?"

•

"please─"

"for the last time, gon, NO!"

"but aunt mito, it was all alone and it looked really─"

"gon freecss─"

unsurprisingly, killua was on mito's side. again.

he honestly understands why she won't let him keep it─ if it were up to him, he wouldn't of let him even bring it in the house to begin with ─it's filthy. and, killua hates dogs. they're loud, drool over everything, chew on things constantly, you have to walk them all the time and─

"fine."

killua nearly chokes on his drink.

"really?!"

"yes─ but you have to take care of it and─ gon?!"

he practically tackles her into a hug, beaming as his smile nearly splits his face in two with how wide it is, the stupid blue nosed pit wagging it's tail beside him. it seems like it's already taken a liking to him. ugh.

killua doesn't know how much longer he can sit here and watch─ he's going to be sick, oh gods─

"killua! come on, let's go and play with the puppy!"

he's lifted to his feet fairly quick─ reminding him that gon isn't just a normal size for his age, as he's found out today ─and pulled out the back door before he can complain about it being nine o' clock at night. however, once they reach the beach, he can hardly find it in himself to complain. it's much cooler at night─ even more so by the water. he doesn't mind, it's nice.

the sky is dark, vast with stars and a big, pale moon. it's the first time he's been outside when the stars are out on whale island and there's something just so different about it. he thought the stars he'd seen on the boat to york new were breath taking─ certainly much more prettier then what he saw back at home, with the cloudy, always clear murky skies.

but this is just ethereal.

it's so bright, and there's so many─ their not spread out, all bunched together in a way that's so beautiful killua can't seem to understand. but he doesn't want to. there's blue up there─ a deep, mesmerizing blue ─and little, tiny bits of purple, however faint. these stars are tiny and for some reason, killua now wants stars to be this tiny all the time.

he doesn't know why, though. it's just the sky, something he's never cared for. but this...he doesn't know how to explain it─ just show it to people to make them understand because he knows they will.

and it's so calm, so peaceful. he could look up at the night sky until it's gone, just to feel the high it gives─ just for a little longer.

"why do you keep rebelling, kil? you know it'll only make things harder for you."

killua sighs with a soft smile, looking up at the stars as he closes his eyes, feeling a sudden gush of wind blow through his hair. distantly, he can hear gon and the puppy running towards him, gon laughing as the dog yips playfully.

"it's nice here."


	4. gon freecss

"i've been thinking about a name..."

killua hums, taking out their neatly wrapped peanut butter and jelly sandwiches from the pinic basket and setting them on the blanket beside their waters.

"okay, and?"

he takes the bag of sun chips before gon can, leaning back. they're sitting under a tree in the forest, by the river─ gon's idea, naturally. but killua couldn't find it in himself to say no because, it did sound like a good idea. it's rather warm out today, after all.

"i was thinking we could call him lumpy."

killua scoffs "lumpy? really, gon?"

gon watches as said dog suddenly runs to them, a stick in his mouth as he drools. killua grimaces as he watches gon take the it out of his mouth and throw it again, the puppy chasing after it immediately.

he sighs, taking a sip of his water with a roll of his. "whatever. it's still stupid, though."

gon seems to take offense to that.

"wha─ well, what do you wanna call him, then?"

killua pauses a moment, thinking it over as he watches the puppy stumble his way back to them, before finally opening his sandwich and taking a bite. he waits until he swallows to speak.

"mutt."

"killua..."

"hm?"

"that's mean."

"it's true─ hey, don't pout about it! you said we were naming him lumpy, right?"

a nod.

"then there. geez, you're so sensitive!"

gon wants to agure that he is, in fact, not sensitive but that would just prove his point so.

gon grins when the puppy runs up to them once more─ stick still in his mouth ─and picks him up this time. he laughs when the dog licks his face, happy to see him, and then hugs him before setting him down in his lap.

"lumpy! that's your name now, what do you think of it?"

"gon. it's a dog, it can't speak─"

he's cut short when the puppy lets out a little yip, tiny voice cracking as he does. killua's starting to wonder just how young this mutt is...and what happened to his mother. but, that would mean he cares and killua zoldyck does not care about dogs, of all things.

it's simply disgusting.

"ah, killua, did you hear that?! he likes it! dont'cha, lumpy?"

he only licks gon's face this time, tail wagging back and forth frantically and killua swears that mutt is so happy it's smiling.

again. digusting.

•

"...do you think he can swim?"

killua grins, putting a hand on his hip as he closes his eyes.

"who knows. do you wanna find out?"

"KILLUA!"

he snickers, pulling his shirt over his head "relax! i was only kidding, okay?"

gon, unconvinced, takes his shirt off as well, throwing it beside his shorts on the river bank. "you didn't look like you were kidding."

he feels his heart fall directly to his feet when he turns around to see killua, in gon's swim trunks that he let him borrow, toeing himself into the water. he bites the inside of his cheek as he quickly puts his own on, thinking it's not fair that killua looks so good in them. he inhales deeply once he's done and turns to find that killua's only got one foot in the water, hands held together tightly at his chest as he eyes the water.

"shit, it's so cold!"

suddenly, as if a lightbulb flashes above his head, gon carefully, quitely, sneaks up behind killua. he sees him shiver as he finally dips his other foot in only to take it out immediately. gon frowns. is it really that cold?

killua whines, taking his foot out of the river with a full body shiver this time. "gonnn, is the water always this cold in the middle of su─ AHHHH!"

suddenly, his eyes sting and he can't breath, and everything is really, really blurry. killua swims to the surface and gasps for air when he reaches it, couching horribly as he squints his eyes closed because fuck, it burns.

"g-gon freecss, you complete and utter brat!"

gon, however, stops laughing the moment he realizes that killua is coughing up water─ choking ─because there's water in his lungs. his heart drops and he instantly takes large steps foward, trying to reach killua before─

and now, he's the one falling.

he feels so betrayed when he comes up for air, looking at the river bank in pure shock when his big, brown eyes land on lumpy, who's just sitting there now, wagging his tail at him as he yips playfully.

"l-lumpy?!"

there's water suddenly splashed in his face and it goes directly up his nose and he hates it. he shakes his head side to side, making a displeased sound. however, it dies in his throat the moment killua's laughter rings in his ears because it's so beautiful.

"ha! how does it feel? and by your oh so faithful mutt, too! pwhaha!"

he's blushing now. he knows he is.

killua just looks so pretty right now─ hair damp and sticking to his forehead, a pure, pure smile streching across his face making his eyes crinkle at the sides adorably. he just looks so happy and that─ that is all gon wants.

maybe he should be betrayed by lumpy more often.

•

"oh gosh, killua please don't─"

"i said i wasn't going to drop him the first seven times you asked, so shut up already! if you keep distracting me, i might, you know."

that seems to shut him.

gon watches─ quite nervously ─as killua holds lumpy in the water, letting the puppy doggy paddle in killua's hold experimently. he splashes water on killua quite a lot and even when he complains, he never once asks for gon to take over. he has a strong grip at the puppies sides─ yet gentle, gon notices ─and he never lets his head go under once. not even on accident.

it's almost as if...

gon smiles to himself, watching killua laugh when lumpy suddenly sneezes, yipping after before his tail starts to wag again. he suddenly wants to wrap his arms around both of them and just hold them, maybe push killua's bangs away from his forehead just long enough to kiss the delicate skin.

however, before he can even think about acting on it, lumpy whines.

killua immediately takes him out of the water, holding him out to look him over for any injuries because he knows he didn't let him go underwater. he won't stop whinning, though. with a frown, killua holds him to his chest─ he's hugging him but gon knows if he points it out that he'll probably shove him into gon's arm instead ─trying to warm him up because that's the only other thing he can think of it that might be wrong.

he strokes his back gently, pressing him closer to himself as his frown shifts to worry.

ah. so gon was right, after all. killua does care about the puppy.

"gon─"

they freeze.

killua knows he's not hearing things─ that was a fucking growl and─

"killua,"

he's whispering, eyes locked on the bear at the river bank. killua doesn't trust his voice enough right now to talk, so he only looks at gon, eyes blown wide as lumpy trembles in his arms. gon was the one out of the two of them that was good with animals, right? he'll know what to do, he has to─

"killua, don't move. just stay there, okay?"

he swallows the sudden lump in his throat as gon steps in front of him, big, tan arms stretching out and it's then that killua realizes that gon's trying to protect him. he wants to shove him away, wants yell at him and tell him how he doesn't need to be protected but for some reason, it feels so, so nice.

no ones ever done this for him. no ones ever cared enough.

the bear─ a black bear, gon notices ─just looks at him, and solely him. gon doesn't believe he's ever met this particular bear before but, he does remember what aunt mito told him about black bears. black bears─ despite their rather large size ─are more scared of you then you are of them so, to scare one off, aunt mito had told him to simply stand his ground and make himself look as big as possible.

and he does just that.

lumpy whines again, suddenly, as if he feels the tension.

"h-hey, shhh,"

gon's frown deepens even more, hearing killua─ who is usually so strong and brave ─sound so frightened. gon could easily tell from the way killua acted when they first met that he wasn't used to the counrty side, so he can only imagine how terrfied he must be. probably more then lumpy, even.

killua tries to calm the puppy held tightly in his arms down as best he can, petting him, whispering to him sweetly that he's okay─ he even kisses his little head. it seems to help─ even if only a little bit, but he stops making any noise at all when the bear suddenly turns around and leaves, stalking deeper into the forest.

the water tension brakes when gon turns around to face him, slightly looking down at him with those stupid, big eyes of his. he looks worried.

"are you okay?"

"idiot...it didn't even come near us─ so obviously!"

it doesn't have the usual bite behind it but gon can't blame him─ that's probably the first time killua's ever seen a wild animal up that close before.

gon's shoulders hang at that and he lets out a huff of relief, wrapping his arms around killua, lumpy squished inbetween them. however, the puppy doesn't seem to mind too much, dozing off. killua frowns. he probably wore himself out with all that constant whinning.

"i─ i'm sorry killua, i didn't think bears would be out this close to─"

killua gently pushes himself out of gon's chest, gon's arms still around him, and smiles. it's so soft and genuine and gon feels a warmth spreading through out his chest again.

"it's okay, gon─ we still had fun today, didn't we?"

"i...yeah. yeah, we did."

"then stop talking like that ruined everything! now, help me put this mutt on the blanket without waking him. he's really, really tired."

gon can't help but to smile.

killua definitely likes the puppy.


	5. every other tuesday

he's wearing it─ the sweater. he's wearing it and he was right, he does look pretty in it. so very, very pretty.

"─on? argh, are you even listening?!"

"huh?"

killua huffs, blowing a stray strand of hair that's a bit longer than the rest out of his face.

gon just can't believe he bought the sweater anyway─ he remembers killua throwing such a fit about it in the store because it was pink and yet...

he's wearing it, right now, lazily sitting on gon's bed as gon searches through his closet, the sound of the rain distantly pattering on the roof in the background. lumpy's laying in killua's lap, fast alseep as he gently runs his pale, thin fingers across his furr with care. gon's noticed that ever since the accident with the bear, lumpy's started to favor killua suddenly.

and killua hasn't complained once. gon just wants to melt everytime he thinks about how much killua really cares about the blue nosed little pit.

"you're hopeless, honestly. i said; what are we gonna today? it's raining, so we can't go outside."

gon hums with a smile, finally finding his rain coat in the back─ behind some boxes with his baby clothes that aunt mito won't let him through away.

"actually, today's one of the days i help miss mae at the libary put the books that are returned back on the right shelves─ every other tuesday, actually─"

"so you're just going to leave me here all day?!"

gon finishes shrugging on the rain coat with a laugh.

"you didn't let me finish! i was about to ask you if you wanted to come too."

for only a brief moment, gon swore he saw killua blush but, it was gone as soon as it appeared. he frowns, turning back to his closet to find another rain coat as lumpy stirs from his sleep, digging his head into killua's lap with a whine. killua huffs─ though it was more of a laugh, if you aksed gon ─and picks the puppy up.

gon's never seen killua blush.

•

"we...so we can't bring lumpy?"

he looks so sad─ so dejected.

"sorry, killua, but miss mae doesn't allow animals in the libary─ just in case they damage the books, y'know?"

"...oh."

he stares down at where he's got lumpy hidden in his rain coat─ little head peaking out just enough that he can see ─so he won't get wet, and he looks like he's about to cry.

now gon wants to cry because for some reason, he feels like the bad guy here.

"h-hey, you know aunt mito will take really good care of him─"

"i─...i know. fuck, sorry, just─"

he understands why he's so upset─ they haven't left each other's sides since that day when they went on the pinic. even lumpy looks sad that he has to stay behind.

gon didn't know that dogs could cry until he met lumpy freecss.

he clears his throat to try and get rid of the burning feeling "you know, you don't have to go if─"

"n-no, no, it's just a dog─ just a mutt, i...i don't know why i'm acting like this."

"you say that but, killua, you haven't let go of him yet so we can leave."

glassy, dark blue eyes widen and suddenly─ if somehow possible ─killua holds lumpy even closer to his chest under the thick rain coat. he kisses the puppies head, closing his own eyes at a poor attempt to hide the tears collecting there. after a long, long minute, killua slowly unzips the coat and sets lumpy on the living room floor much more gently then he needed to.

and lumpy just looks so confused, big turquoise eyes staring up at blue gray ones.

gon doesn't know how much more he can watch before he bursts into tears himself because fuck, why are they so attached to each other? it's too cute to be real─ there's just no way the universe ment for these two to meet because together they hold far, far too much power over gon.

it's almost scary, really.

"look, i─ i'll be back soon, okay? just...just don't get into trouble, alright?"

lumpy gives him the most pitful yip gon's ever heard in his life.

and it seems to break killua's heart just as much because he scoops him right back up again and kisses him over and over and over until lumpy cheers up because there's just simply no way killua could leave him like that.

•

"i like your sweater─ it looks really pretty on you."

he turns away from gon before he could see if he made him blush or not. gon feels...oddly challanged by it. for some weird gon reason, as killua would say.

"i mean it, you know? you should wear sweaters more often!"

again, he's ignored. he just keeps putting the fantasy books back on their respective shelf, facing away from him.

maybe he's not trying hard enough.

"i also think that pink really compliments your skin and it makes your hair look even softer then usual."

"i've always loved the color of your eyes the most, though. their...hard to explain. the color, i mean. i've never seen a shade of blue like yours. it's not light or normal─ but it's not exactly dark, either. it's more like a clear, night sky when the moon is lit just right, just─"

"OKAY! that's enough! just get b-back to work, idiot!"

his face is ten shades darker when he turns to face gon again─ a dark, dark pink because his complexion is far too light to ever turn red from just blushing. his eyes are big, softer then normal as he looks anywhere but gon. gon suddenly forgets all about the books stacked beside him that he's supposed to be putting on the shelf because killua is blushing.

he's blushing─ blushing because of gon.

gon feels as if he can run around the entire world and back right now, not even trying to fight the smile that pulls at his lips.

"right, right─" he pauses "actually, let's take a break? i'm kinda tired..."

"whatever, moron."

he's still blushing.

•

"why do you look like that?"

he's only staring at his lunch mito packed for them, slouched over one of the tables at the back of the libary. he shurgs.

"like what?"

gon frowns. he didn't mean to make killua uncomfortable.

"are you still upset about all those things i said? i'm sorry, killua, i just─"

"n-no, it's...it's not that."

gon only remains confused for all of ten seconds before it finally dawns on him.

"...i'm sure aunt mito is taking really good care of him, so, please don't worry, okay? he's fine, promise!"

he shakes his head "i─ i know that. but..."

gon just wants to reach out and hold him at this point, really.

his voice is suddenly so, so much more softer─ so much more caring. "killuaaa, i can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong, y'know?"

killua pokes his bottom lip out, now laying his right cheek on the cool surface of the table, facing gon. he still won't look at him though─ not directly, anyway.

"i...i've never had a pet before."

gon looks at him for a moment, watching the way killua bites at the inside of the cheek that's not pressed into the table─ like he's not supposed to tell him all this. gon hums, showing that he's still listening, as he copies killua─ pressing the left side of his face onto the table. their now so close that gon can feel killua's breathing and he just wants to stay here forever, looking into his eyes because, again, he's never seen a shade of blue like that.

he's whispering now.

"it just feels...weird, in a good way. i guess. i dunno. i'm not used to loving anyone, really."

gon's heart swells.

he smiles so gently at him and killua blushes again. "so you love lumpy?"

"...i guess. yeah."

gon will have to talk to miss mae about making an exception to her no pet policy.


	6. pretty

"gonnn─"

he laughs, taking killua's hand into his and gently pulling the boy to where the little fox is sitting, watching gon curiously. they decided to go exploring today and after spending an hour of trying to convince killua that bringing lumpy might be dangerous─ they left. killua had tried to reason that lumpy would be just fine as long he was there to protect him.

gon still said no, in the end, of course. it was to much of a risk─ to both of them.

"i already said he won't bite, killua. do you really not trust me?"

a pause.

"that...that's not it. you're right, sorry."

"whaa─ since when did you start listening to what i say, hm?"

"oh, do you want me to stop?! you selfish little brat─"

"killua, you have to lower your voice or you'll scare him away!"

he snaps his mouth shut with a growl, glaring at gon as he walks towards the little cub at the bottom of the cliff─ they're at the edge of the forest and killua can see the beach through the tree lines from here. though, he still doesn't understand why a fox cub would be all alone this close to the ocean instead of deeper in the forest but. he's not the animal expert between the two of them so he chooses to simply ignore it.

it's not his problem, he tells himself.

gon smiles, rubbing behind the cubs ear and it makes a small noise─ clearly happy ─and does a little wiggle, tail moving from side to side on the forest floor. it almost looks like it was attempting to wag it's tail but not quite. it's annoyingly cute, killua notes with a huff.

"killua, come and say hi! he won't bite─ promise!"

he hates how gon has this way about him, how he can make anything sound like it's okay, that's it's going to okay, that everything will be okay. he's sitting beside gon before he stop himself, hestaintly reaching out while gon holds his hand in his because he knows killua is still scared, and pets the little fox.

it makes the same happy noise.

again, annoyingly cute.

"his name his kon."

"...where's his parents?"

gon frowns, and killua can already tell what happened by the way his shoulders suddenly hang.

"his mother was killed by poltures that were on the island two months ago─ just before you washed up here, actually. but his dad is still out there so, kon's okay."

"that's sad."

"mhm."

gon doesn't miss the way killua's eyes change─ a deeper blue then normal that's he's learned only happens when he gets emotional. he doesn't say a word when killua suddenly wants to pet kon, doesn't miss the small smile he tries to hide. but then it suddenly drops and is replaced by a frown.

"he's awfully young to survive without a mother..."

"yeah, i thought that too when i took him home with me. i helped aunt mito bottle feed him for about a month before we turned him loose again─ but then two weeks later, i saw kon's dad bringing a rabbit back to their den so i knew he would be okay."

that seems to calm killua down a bit, sighing through his nose as a gush of the ocean breeze suddenly comes by, making both of their hair sway with the motion.

"and then i met you."

killua turns to him, and this time he doesn't try to hide his smile. it makes gon's heart flutter with something he's never felt─ not before he met killua.

"yeah?"

"yeah. i was actually coming back from checking up on kon the day i saw you on the beach."

that would certainly explain why this cub is at the edge of the forest, so close to the beach─ their den must be nearby.

"i...i actually thought you were dead that day but then...then you started moving and i couldn't stop myself from running down the hill to get to you─ i almost fell trying to get to you, y'know?"

he can't help the laugh that bubbles from him "you were that worried about a stranger?"

gon seems to actually think about it for a moment, leaning back on his hands as he looks up at the cliff above them. it's almost dark, he realizes. "guess so, huh?"

killua follows his gaze, kon curled up around his feet, and smiles fully this time. it's not small or shy─ he's not trying to hide it, he can't. he feels likes he's floating right now and he never wants to come down─ ever.

"well...i'm glad you did."

•

"what's so important that we had to climb all the way up here─ your aunt is going to kill us when we show up and the suns is looong gone, idiot!"

"i know, i know but it'll be worth it!"

killua's thinking about just pushing him off the cliff and into the ocean...if he could see right now, that is─ really, what's so important that he has to cover his eyes. and what's worse is gon is the one doing it because he says he doesn't trust killua not to peek.

what a joke. he would never.

"okay, we're here now!"

...actually, no, he takes it back─ he would totally peek.

gon moves his hands away from his face and suddenly, killua forgets how to breathe. there's stars─ many, many stars again. it looks exactly like it did back on the beach but for some reason, they just look so much closer this time.

it's almost as if he could reach out and touch them─

"killua! over here!"

he blinks out of his daze and looks to where gon is trying to start a fire with two stones over a pile of wood in the little opening on the top of the cliff and it's then that killua realizes that gon's been up here before.

he's in a another daze, another blissful daze. he has no idea how long they've been laying here, counting the stars as they talk about random things, little things. it feels so surreal─ all of it. but in that moment, all he could focus on was gon. whatever gon was talking about, gon's laugh, gon's smile, the way his nose would scrunch up every once in awhile─ just gon.

he doesn't know why he asks─ why he cares, doesn't think of the consequences that might happen. he doesn't think when he's around gon, he can't. he doesn't need to because everything just feels right.

his voice is barely above a whisper.

"gon..."

"yeah?"

"did...did you mean all those things you said? at the libary?"

he doesn't stop think about what killua is talking about─ almost as if he was waiting for him ask. killua's never felt so small and vulnerable and has to fight the strong, strong urge to curl in on himself.

"of course─ i'd never lie to you."

he can feel himself tearing up so he turns his head away, well, that and also to hide his smile.

"killua is very, very pretty. i mean it, really."

cloudly blue gray eyes find themselves drifting back to the stars and there's suddenly a warm, warm heat fluttering about in his chest.

gon thinks he's pretty.


	7. define perfect

it's so random─ he's so random. killua doesn't understand how a simple run to the market for mito could fluster him so badly.

"killua,"

oh. that's why. 

"i think it'll be...fun? wait, no─ oh! perfect. it'll be perfect."

"more like dangerous─ that was still in the woods, gon, and a house on a cliff just sounds ridiculous, especially so close to the ocean, idoit."

"wha─ i'm good with animals!"

and that seems to shut killua right up because, yes, he knows gon is amazing with any creature they suddenly run across while exploring. he can't deny that, he also doesn't want to listen to gon gloat about it either so, he stays quiet.

"but..."

killua turns to face him, setting a tea cup back in it's stall.

"hmm?"

"i think it'll only be perfect if you're there too."

they look deeply at each other, and killua swears that he can see freckles he didn't know gon even had until now. after awhile though, killua smiles, warmly, sweetly, completely and utterly lovesick.

he doesn't think when he's around gon and it shows time, and time again.

"yeah...that does sound perfect, doesn't it?"

however, their moment doesn't last long as a tiny yip comes from the baby sling wrapped around killua's chest. it was mito's idea, actually─ she had said that since killua seemed to have such separation anxiety whenever they couldn't bring lumpy with them, that this would might help. and it did, in fact, work. now killua brings him in pretty much everywhere they go and the shop keepers don't seem to mind because it's not like the puppy could just jump down on his own and destroy things. 

not that lumpy would, of course.

he's even allowed to bring him in the libary every other tuesday when he helps gon─ as long as he stays in the sling, miss mae had said.

but...that didn't mean they didn't get stares─ from older men, specifically. they seemed to be the only people to care on the entire island and it makes gon's blood absolutely boil when they looked at killua so judgementally. though, he didn't act on it because, well, killua simply ignored them, kissing lumpy's head as the pup licked his face.

for the life of him gon couldn't figure out why the old men─ specifically the three that hung out by the bar in town ─would look so hatefully at killua whenever they walked by. was it because he was acting like a mother to the abandoned puppy they found a month ago? gon didn't see the problem with it, he thought it was the most adorable thing he's ever seen and ever will see.

and besides, gon knows killua─ unlike those guys ─he knows that killua's been sheltered his entire life and he's never been allowed to have things. so, it's only natural that when's given a puppy, who's been left for dead, mind you, he gets so attached. it's almost as if killua understands where the little blue nosed pit is coming from but. gon won't press it.

it's not his place.

"hey─ what's wrong?"

killua's looking at the puppy with so much worry─ and, sure, gon's seen killua worried before, but for some reason it's always different when it comes to lumpy. gon's almost jealous.

almost, though.

this time, lumpy growls─ well, tries to at least. he's still very, very young and it comes out much more squeaker then lumpy meant─ bless his little soul.

without a word, killua and gon look to where what's got lumpy so upset and─ oh. it's those three guys again. come to think of it, now that their so close, gon doesn't think he's ever seen them around here before. actually, no, scratch that─ he's definitely never seen them around here before.

it makes his skin crawl─ this can't be good, whatever it is.

"well well, you're far from home, ain'tcha kid?"

they stop a just a few feet away from them, eyeing killua up and down with distaste. it's only then that it dawns on gon that these men weren't looking so hatefully at killua because of the sling he's been carrying lumpy around in─ honestly, he feels like such an idiot for even thinking that because it makes no sense whatsoever.

maybe it was just his mind trying to think of the least complicated situation about all of this─ wishful thinking, he realizes.

"do i know you?"

the man in the middle scoffs, seemingly upset by this.

"of course you wouldn't remeber me─ you spoiled brat!"

killua sighs, bouncing lumpy a bit to try and distract him so he'll stop trying to growl because it's just pitful at this point...and, well, distracting to killua because it's the cutest thing he's ever heard. he can't get rid of these guys if he's too busy pressing kisses to the puppies button nose, he supposes. 

"look, if this has something to do with my family then fuck off, will you?"

the man snarls, baring his teeth.

it all happens so fast─ one moment the largest out of the three men was charging at killua with complete and utter muder in his eyes, bloodlust oozing off of him from head to toe, and the next killua had kicked him in his ribs faster then gon could try and stop the man. he doubled over, couching up blood as he cursed killua's names, looking up at him with blood shot eyes. he was about to try and get up again but his companions must have thought that was a bad idea because they dragged him out of there, quite quickly, gon notices.

gon could only stare as killua huffed, clearly annoyed, as he patted lumpy's head.

"argh, i hate when that happens! and it's always the same kind of guys, too!"

"...that's happened before?"

killua scoffs, walking off to finish getting everything on mito's list─ they're having rabbit stew again tonight. gon quickly catches up to him.

"yeah, it's happened before. three times before i came here─ and they always act the same! like it's my fault or something! it really gets under my skin."

if gon had been any other person, he would have asked long ago where killua came from. what happened─ why he was covered in so many stab marks and bruises when he washed up on that beach. and this certaintly would have tipped a normal person over the edge, they would have immediately asked what that was all about, why they were so angry.

gon laughs a little "i can tell."

"yeah, and he made me hurt him in front of lumpy! he didn't need to see that!"

gon wants to remind him that lumpy couldn't see a thing because he was facing killua's chest the whole─ that the pup couldn't have turned around to watch even he wanted to because of the sling ─but, killua's already upset enough as it is. he doesn't want that pointed towards him right now.

"what's with that? you sound as if he'll grow up to become some type of gang memeber from just seeing one fight."

that only seems to anger him more.

"because he might! i don't want him out there fighting some stray in an alley over a bone or something one day! he could easily just come home and i'll feed him. simple as that."

"you really treat him like he's an actual child, you know that, right?"

and now he's blushing.

"i do not!"


	8. killua zoldyck

killua didn't know two seated bicycles even existed until today.

but here he was, on the back seat with gon steering─ lumpy in basket attached to the front ─riding around town. he's facing the road behind them, back to back with gon as they stride past the market in a blurr, leaving dust in their wake. gon's pedaling so fast, almost too fast, as they rush home because mito had said not to stay gone for too long, that it was supposed to rain later.

of course, they hadn't listened.

as soon as it started to lightly sprinkle while they looking inside the window of the bakery─ killua had saw something sweet that caught his eye, lumpy in the sling ─they bolted back to the bicycle. killua knows gon only brought it for this very reason─ he knew they would forget about the weather, but, for some reason, neither of them seemed upset about it.

neither of them complained when it suddenly started pouring halfway home, gon and simply turned off the little dirt road and into the forest. they wondered around for awhile, the tree's providing some sort shelter but not enough, until they stumbled across a small cave.

and so here they are, completely soaked from head to toe, by a fire gon started. it provided some light, at least.

"your aunt is going to kill us."

"probably."

killua smiled and gon couldn't help but to laugh, leaning back on his hands as he looked at the ceiling of the cave. there weren't any bats in sight which...gon found weird but, couldn't seemed to be bothered enough worry about it─ to busy talking to killua because he was always his top priority as of late.

"he's starting to get a little bigger..."

he follows his gaze to where lumpy is laying in killua's lap, the sling beside them, long forgotten. he snickers, and killua can't help but to blush at the way his nose scrunches up, looking away with a pout.

"you sound like his mother again─ like you don't want him to grow up!"

"wha─ that's because i don't! what if he doesn't want to be held and loved on when he's older?!"

"killuaaaa, lumpy's a dog─ not a baby!"

"stop making fun of me!"

but he doesn't, of course, breaking out into a fit of laughter as killua pouts harder, looking at lumpy's sleepy eyes.

"don't worry, i'm sure he'll still beg you to carry him around in the sling even when he's fully grown. you spoil him too much, you know."

"i─"

he can't even say it because they both know that it's a lie. even lumpy knows to sit by killua's feet instead of gon's at dinner because gon refuses to feed him off the table─ aunt mito says it will mess with the pups stomach. and killua agrees─ he really, really does but when he looks into those sad, big pleading turquoise eyes, he loses all common sense.

much like with a certain boy he knows that wears entirely too much green for his taste.

he changes the subject with a sigh, petting the puppy's head as his little eyes begin to close.

"you think i'll stick around long enough to see him grow up?"

he's sound so unsure─ alomst like he's asking himself rather then gon.

he grins "i've got a feeling you might─ you wouldn't leave lumpy behind so easily."

"gon, i'm serious."

oh. he's...wait─

"are...are you thinking about leaving?"

the fire pops and lumpy jumps a bit in his sleep, killua kissing his head softly to calm him before he's already dozed off again. gon watches him, how his long lashes cast shadows over his pale, delicate cheeks from the dim fire as he looks at the pup in his lap, the only light they have in the small cave.

"i...i dunno."

he's sounds so torn.

"well, if you decide to leave that's okay. i won't be mad─"

he scoffs, glaring at the fire "of course you won't, idiot..." suddenly, his face softens, even if only a little bit gon doesn't miss the way his eyes grow a shade darker, thin brows un-furrowing. "but would you want me to leave is what i'm asking, i guess."

he wasn't expecting that.

gon looks to the entrance of the cave where the bike his leaning againt the cave, and he notices how it's darker now, how the rain has let up sense they've been here. they should probably get going soon before aunt mito sends someone in town to look for them, knowing her.

his chest hurts.

"no...i wouldn't want you to leave, no. but─ it you want to, then, that's okay. whatever you want, i'm fine with."

killua's voice is so, so soft now. 

"you're weird."

"yeah, i know, you keep telling me that."

"it's true─"

they both freeze, smiles still on their faces, and lumpy suddenly seems very, very awake. no wonder there were no bats in this cave─ not when bears live in it. they both look behind them, seeing the same black bear from two weeks ago growling, two cubs at it's feet. killua doesn't think he's ever ran this fast in his life.

they're out of the cave within seconds, screaming as the bear chases after them. gon grabbed the bike on their way out, trying to catch up to killua, lumpy already in the sling again.

aunto mito's going to kill them─ gon can feel it in his bones this time.


	9. selfish

it's so warm.

they've been laying on the beach for an hour now, waiting for the stars to come out as lumpy nibbles on a bone he dug up. killua doesn't want to know what it's from─ however, it seems like it belonged to an animal so that somewhat clams his nerves. it's better them him chasing a crab, though─ killua nearly had a heartattack when he saw it, snatching him and scolding because he could of gotten hurt playing with that thing!

gon had only watched, laughing when the crab had gotten dragged back into the ocean by a wave. that seemed to stop killua from getting onto to the little blue nosed pit, as if he could understand him─ which for some reason looked as if he did, by the way he whined in shame, little head hanging and tail tucked between his legs ─setting him down.

and here they are, making shapes out of stars as lumpy lays in between them, bone protectively held in his paws as he naws on it.

killua pulls a face, seemingly disgusted by one shape in particular, pointing up at it in horror. "that one looks like a pig!"

"i like pigs..."

"of course you do─ i mean it reminds me of my brother, idiot!"

as if gon was supposed to know that but, natrually, he only laughs it off.

"is your brother a pig?"

"wha─ there you go again!"

"what?"

"making fun of me!"

and now gon doesn't think anything is funny, smile dropping as he sits up frantically to look down at killua.

"i didn't mean to, honest! i'm sorry─"

killua sits up with a heavy sigh, shaking his head with a smile as he comes face to face with gon.

"i was only kidding─ why do you always react that way?"

"because i don't want you to feel bad."

he hums, looking back at the sky as he feels a warmth crawl up his neck. "you're weird."

gon chuckles, laying back down as he follows his gaze. "you only say that when you're embarrassed, you know."

"whatever."

it's quiet for awhile after that, just the sole sound of the waves in the distant and lumpy aggressively trying to chew on the bone with his dull kanies in the background. killua's layed back down now, pointing out when he saw stars that bunched together like a bunny and gon instantly said it reminds him of killua. he called him an idiot, of course, and turned away until his blush calmed down.

just little things like that─ it makes gon feel things, things he's never felt before. he can't describe it, though he's tried. he tries to word it out in his head─ what he's feeling ─but he can't. it's so strange and yet, gon loves it. he loves being around killua because everything just feels right when he does.

and for the first time in his life, killua zoldyck sees a shooting star.

gon watches him─ how his eyes sparkle as he watches it go flying by, how he gasps when it happens. he's just so breathtaking and gon can't stop watching him.

"g-gon, wha...what was that?"

he looks back at the sky when killua turns his head to him, a soft of child like confusion written on his soft features.

"that was a shooting star, you make a wish whenever you see one."

"oh..."

blue eyes slowly travel back to the stars with a pure glint in them.

"what did you wish for?"

gon looks surpised for a moment but, then he smiles at him. "it's...very selfish, but, i won't lie."

of course he wouldn't─ not to killua.

"i wished that you could stay here forever and then the day after, maybe even longer─ if possible."

killua only glances at gon in awe and after a moment, gon asks him what he wished for.

"it's a secret."

•

they tend to get distracted quite a lot when they're together so, it's only natrual that when they see fire flies outside just as they're about to go in and eat that night after they're afternoon at the beach, they stop to catch them.

well, gon seems to think so at least and if aunt mito saw them outside the kitchen window, she didn't try to stop them.

"gonnnn, this is pointless! everytime i─"

gon laughs softly, lightly jogging over to where killua is. "that's because you're doing it too fast! you gotta be just a little slower, okay?"

killua goes to groan, rolling his eyes but he seems to tense up quite horribly when gon is suddenly behind him, grabbing his hands and holding them out. it almost feels like he's whispering in his ear when he speaks again and killua can't help but to blush, thankful that gon can't see his face right now.

"there, now we just wait."

"r-right."

and sure enough, after a moment, a fire fly lands in the middle of his right palm. carefully, gon brings killua's left hand down until it's trapped the little bug, buzzing around rappidly in between his palms now. gon laughs when killua lets out a breath, releasing his hands and stepping in front of him with a beaming smile though his voice is calm, smooth and gentle when he speaks, a gleam in his eyes as he looks down at killua.

he looks so amazed as he peaks through his fingers to see the bug.

"it's still lit up!"

gon shakes his head with a laugh. "do you wanna keep it or let it go?"

he pauses─ he looks so serious.

"let it go...i don't want lumpy getting jealous or something."

"right, right."

hesitantly, killua opens his hands and the fire fly is already gone, mixing in with the others by the kitchen window. he stares at them for a moment before leaning down to hold lumpy when he comes running up─ the bone still in his mouth. killua's smiling so, so warmly at him.

he sighs through his nose with a laugh "you still haven't even broke the first layer, huh? i told you, you're just going to have to wait until you're older and your teeth are sharper, you little goofball."

that earns him a little yip, the bone dropping to the ground in favor of licking killua's face. he's happy to see him, gon realizes.

"and you'll have to leave the bone outside─ you know she won't let you bring that in the house, right?"

gon couldn't stop himself for some reason, it had just slipped out. it's a word he's never used on a person before, so much deeper then pretty.

"you're beautiful, killua."

gon watches as the blush blossoms from head to toe, a pink flush over the usually pale and clear skin. it only makes gon thinks he's the most lucky person alive to have been able to meet killua─ beautiful, beautiful killua.

killua's respone, however, was something gon never thought he'd hear him say─ however shy it came out.

"y-you...you're not that bad either, you know."


	10. warm

killua wakes up rather late the next morning, stumbling into the bathroom to find gon still half asleep while brushing his teeth. he yawns, reaching for his own tooth brush while walking up beside gon who's still in a daze, eyes closed as he mindlessly scrubs. once killua starts brushing his own teeth, however, he leans his head on gon's shoulder with another yawn.

gon tenses for a moment before smiling to himself, leaning his head on killua's.

once they finish up, they get dressed and head downstairs for breakfast, like every other morning. they share the bed now, have been for awhile, actually. they don't think too much on it, not when it feels so euphoric waking up in each other's arms, limbs tangled together and the warm, delicate morning sunlight gently hitting their faces. there's no reason to think into it, gon thinks. 

they've fallen into a little routine without realizing it and mito loves watching them go about in the mornings as she sips her coffee in the living room, breakfast already on the table, natrually.

but this morning, however, mito isn't on the couch. she's left a note on the kitchen table beside their plates that she's gone out for a hair appointment, saying she won't be back for some hours and not to get into trouble. as gon reads the note aloud, killua sneaks a piece of bacon under the table to lumpy who's already waiting.

"huh..so, what do you wanna do today."

"anything s'fine."

"hm."

killua sips on his chocolate milk with closed eyes, still trying to wake up, lumpy nibbling on his toes under the table with a whine. ah, he wants more.

"...we could get aunt mito some more flowers─ her favorites are sunflowers, she likes the smell of those a lot."

"idiot, how are we supposed to buy some while she's in town without her seeing us?"

"..."

"...why are smiling at me like that?"

•

"i don't know why i put up with you, honestly."

mito had said not to get into trouble while she was gone. killua distinctly remembers the letter saying not to─

they're in a sunflower field─ or, more precisely, some farmers field. a grumpy, old, lonely farmer who's more than likely got nothing better to do then wait around for trespassers. you know, cause his type always get a kick out of stuff like that for some reason. 

"because you like me, duh."

"as if."

"yip!"

killua looks down at the puppy strapped to his chest and glares. "who's side are you on?!"

"killua, quiet down or we'll get caught!"

he huffs, patting lumpy's head as he looks around. they're hidding in the tall flowers as gon looks for the prefect ones because─ to killua's suprise ─they apparently don't all look the same. gon's holding the three out five he wants as he slowly moves foward and it's then that killua realizes just how close they're getting the farmers house.

"gon..."

he hums, picking a flower and that seems to help killua's nerves a bit knowing that they've only got one more to find and then they can leave. but, still. you never know.

"gon, hurry up! he's going to come outside any minute now─ i know he is!"

"yip!"

"hush!"

killua feels all the blood drain from his face when he hears the screen door open, the porch creaking under the weight of the man as he walks across it. he looks at gon and gon swears he sees steam coming out his ears. he must be really upset with him, huh?

"you─"

"OI! WHO'S OUT THERE?! I CAN HEAR YA WHISPERN'!"

the sound of the man flicking off the safety to his gun rips through the air and killua instinctively wraps his arms around where lumpy's still in the sling.

"gon freecss i swear to whatever god there is that if i die because of a farmer─"

gon waves him off with a fond shake of his head and killua thinks he's acting far too calm in this situation. does he not understand how serious this is? ugh, that boy absolutely makes killua's blood boil sometimes with his stupid─

"it's fine, we're not gonna die today─ oh, hey look!"

he grins, pulling out the last flower and before he has a moment to admire it, killua's already dragging him towards the road. the old man growls, seeing the flowers move as they run hidden within them and raises his gun with a glare.

killua almost trips when he hears the sound of a bullet ripping through the air, yelping out of shock before gon catches him, lifting him and carrying him the rest of the way with the excuse that 'there was no time!'

killua asks lumpy to remind him to kill gon later.

•

"my my, they're beautiful!"

she pauses, bringing them up to her face to let the soft smell cosume her. she smiles at them─ it's gentle and killua's still not used to the kindness that all freecss seem to have. it gives him butterflies everytime.

"they smell lovely, too. i'll have to put them in some water later,"

and suddenly she sets the flowers on the kitchen table before turning back them and wrapping her arms around both of them and─

killua's never been directly hugged before. it's different from when gon held him to calm him down after the bear incident─ much, much more different. it's warm and he suddenly feels fuzzy all over, he feels safe. mito smells like honey and it's sweet─ welcoming. it's warm and he feels like goo in her arms, leaning into her touch with a soft hum. he can't fight the smile that tugs at the corners of his lips, closing his eyes as mito rubs his back lovingly.

killua wants to be hugged more, he realizes.

it's nice.


	11. i love you

they're at the cliff again.

however, this time, gon's teaching him how to fish on the edge of it, a line falling all the way into the ocean. they swing their legs back and forth, talking about what they should do for miss mae's birthday next month. gon's a little put out that it only takes killua one try to catch something─ having only learned the basics ─but, that only lasts for three seconds before he's suddenly very, very proud.

he helps him reel it up to them, the line almost snapping, and they start a fire from there. it cooks for awhile, the sun going down as the smell fills the air and they have to make lumpy stop trying to eat it while it's still cooking because the last thing they want is for him to burn himself.

they lay there, counting stars side by side as killua listens to gon talk about anything really.

"i think i'll build a fence around our house─ so lumpy won't run off."

which makes killua's heart flutter knowing he said that because killua threw a fit about living in a forest─ it's dangerous, especially with a puppy.

"hm, okay─ but only if i can have a swing on a tree beside our house."

"of course."

just little things like that, he didn't care what gon talked about, just wants to listen to his voice. it's so soft and smooth yet has an unexplainable roughness to it that makes his chest feel light.

it's perfect to killua until, suddenly, 

"i love you."

gon rolls over to face killua, smiling ear to ear, a look in his eyes as he tears up. 

"i love you─ a lot, actually."

killua can't breathe, heart beating rapidly in his ears. it's too sudden. he can't, no, not now, he can't, don't, he can't, stop─

"th─ then why are you crying?"

stop it─

"i just, it's─ i'm really, really happy i got to meet you, is all. you're everything to me, you know?"

killua swallows the sudden lump in his throat, ears ringing as a tear finally rolls down rosey cheeks. still, though, he's smiling like a lovesick idiot. pale fingers reach out, gently wiping gon's tears away, voice barely above a whisper "i love you too."

gon's eyes flutter shut at that, smile widening somehow. he holds killua's hands in his own, his other still on gon's cheek, bringing it up to his lips so that he can kiss it with so, so much care.

"i know."

and that's probably what makes him feel so happy about this. to know that killua loves him back, even if he's never voiced it. he can't stop smiling. 

"can i kiss you?"

"please─"

gon can't help but to chuckle at killua's desperate ness as he gently takes hold of the back of killua's head─ touching soft, fair curls ─and brings them together, noses touching for a brief moment before finally, finally, their lips meet. gon sits them both up, holding killua tightly in his arms so he doesn't fall, their lips never leaving each other.

killua's now somewhat sitting in gon's lap, cupping gon's face as gently as he can, gon's arms still wrapped around his middle so he doesn't go anywhere─ not that killua would want to, anyway.

killua doesn't know why but, he's crying. he doesn't understand it, he's happy─ the happiest he's ever been his entire life, in fact.

oh. well, maybe that's why, actually.

killua zoldyck is happy.


	12. epilogue

"you did though!"

"i did not!"

"yes, you did! you called him lump lump! i heard you!"

at the mention of 'lump lump' the pup perks up, tail wagging as he looks up at killua, big turquoise gems eyes shining. killua tries his best to ignore the way gon grins at him out of the corner of his eye but, it doesn't help much. he still feels embarrassed for getting caught─ gon was supposed to be in the shower.

"see? he knows what it means."

"shut up."

he's blushing so badly that his face burns─ it feels like he's on fire. he whines, covering his face with the sleeves of his pink sweater as he allows himself to fall face first onto gon's bed. he just wants to disapear, hide, something─ that moron!

"awww, killuaaa!"

gon plops down beside him, making lumpy yip because he had to move from his spot for him. and apparently it upsets him so badly that he walks out of the room entirely, heading downstairs for what gon can only assume is to eat─ they did just wake up, after all.

he lays on killua's back, whining when he only turns away from him more, still covering his face with his sweater sleeves.

"killua, c'mon, please look at me! i'm sorry, i promise i'll stop teasing!"

his voice is muffled but, gon still hears him nonetheless.

"promise?"

he runs his fingers through pale hair, sighing contently at the softness. he hums, leaning down so he can wrap his arms around killua, burying his face in the milky curls. killua smells sweet─ he's probably already gotten into some type of chocolate and they haven't even been downstairs for breakfast yet.

"i promise. will you look at me now, please?"

he whines, burying his face deeper into his palms "no!"

"why not?"

"b-because!"

he kisses his hair with a smile "because, what?"

"because it's embarrassing!"

"killuaaa, are you blushing?"

that seems to shut him up─ even his whining stops. gon grins, suddenly turning him over on his back while killua still covers his face. he gently grabs his wrists but makes to attempt to move them.

he's whispering now.

"killua, can you please move your hands? i'm not gonna laugh, i just wanna see you, please?"

there he goes again, sweet talking him into things with that gentle, gentle tone.

he's practically trembling when he moves his hands, gon guiding his wrists just far away enough to where he can see his face and oh─ he's just so, so beautiful. his face is flushed a pretty pink, lips glossed over as he looks up at him with slightly teary eyes. they at each other and before either of them now it, gon's leaning down to whisper agaisnt killua's lips, big hands cupping flushed cheeks.

he's smiling.

"you're so pretty, killua. i don't think i'll ever get tired of looking at you, y'know?"

he makes a startled noise as his breath hitches, gon connecting their lips and they kiss slowly, passionately. they take their time, just wanting to feel other each as thin, pale fingers tangle themsevles in thick, dark strands. gon smells like soap from his fresh morning shower and killua can't stop inhaling, the smell fluttering about in the room.

the sound of their lips against each other make's killua blush harder until he pulls away for a breath, hands still in gon's hair as he pants slightly and it only makes gon want to do it again.

"i love you."

gon's voice sounds so hoarse, so tired and gentle all at once. killua smiles, bringing gon's head back down to peck his lips again.

"i love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading 💚💙


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